Thank you, Stillwater, thank you.

So this week I'm out on travel for admissions. My first stop tonight was Stillwater High School...a place I thought I had never visited before. Au contraire. I had, in fact, never actually visited Stillwater High School...but I've attempted. The memory of being endlessly lost on back roads before the GPS era entered my life and having to call the school to cancel my visit came screaming back to me as I turned onto said doomed road once again this evening. Lucky for me, all I had to do tonight was follow a purple line, so I arrived safe, sound, and undismayed. I would have been happy with just that.

However, I ended up with so much more. My prize for actually finding the school this time around was AMAZING. Hands down the best thanks-for-coming gift I've ever received at a college fair. I'd start to explain it, but I'd end up in hysterics again, so I'll just show you:

Wait for it...wait for it...

I almost popped a blood vessel when I opened it and beheld the glory before my eyes. A whole booklet filled with multi-colored post-its notes?!?! Do you know how many of those I go through in a year?! A month?! A DAY?!?!?!?! Oh, so many. I flag pretty much everything I read. Hence my unparalleled enthusiasm.

And as if that wasn't enough...they also gave us CHOCOLATES. I would show you those too...but they didn't last long. So...here's the box:

Thank you, Stillwater High School, thank you. You made my day. And maybe my month too, all things considered.

Thank you, NFL Rewind

Let's talk about something.

The something in question is the predicament facing those who work out at the gym during after-dinner hours. At this point in the day, the remote controls for the TV's have been scattered throughout the facility which leaves the night owls at the mercy of the early birds' channel choices.

It can get ugly.

Such was the case last night. While pedaling away with determined fury I looked up to see Uma Thurman on the TV screen. My entertainment expectations were humbled a bit by this, but not completely squelched. The squelching took place when Uma's body bursts into bloody bits and starts attacking people. And commanding itself to wiggle it's big toe. And then continues attacking people, but this time in animation form. (If you have not seen Kill Bill, this is my official endorsement: don't see it. You will have very odd dreams afterward.)

Needless to say, this was not the inspirational documentary I was craving. I did not want to kill Bill nor did I want to see Bill killed.

When I was finally able to tear my eyes from the wreckage, I realized that the TV next to Blood Bath Central was playing a football game from 1994! Dan Marino in all his sprightly glory against the Drew-Bledsoe-led Patriots! Praise God from whom all blessings flow; I was never happier to watch a live event that look place 16 years ago.

Thank you, NFL Rewind, for saving my workout entertainment options from their disturbing alternatives. I, and my non-violent psyche, am ever so grateful.

Thank you, Joanne.

Let's take a moment to talk about a little known super power. A super power housed in the largest conglomerations of countries the world round. A super power whose attributes include the ability to exchange knowledge and resources, the ability to sway a day in one direction or the other, good or bad, and the ability to evoke tears of joy and gratitude or provoke screams of anguish buried in darkest portions of a man's soul.

The super power of which I speak?

The person on the other end of the Customer Service phone line.

Over the past few days I have been trying to return a package purchased online. In order to do so, I've had to call the Customer Service line. Several times. And then some.

This process has, at times, made me question my sanity. I've talked to approximately a million different people who have all been embittered by the system. I always try to be especially nice to customer service employees because I spent a summer as a technical support representative. Consequently, I know how difficult it can be to deal with people who are calling with the sole intent to whittle you down into a weeping pile of insecurity so that you'll give them the full refund, even though you would have given it to them anyways.

So after speaking with an endless stream of jaded customer service professionals, I called one more time this morning in a final attempt to get all of my questions answered. This time I spoke with a woman named Joanne. I will probably name my firstborn after Joanne in her honor, girl or boy. She was so wonderful! She was pleasant and helpful, and I think I thanked her over one million times.

Her day started well. My day started well. Her kindness made such a difference in my morning, and hopefully my not being an irate, belligerent customer made her day a little easier too. It was a beautiful thing. 

Thank you, Page 2, thank you.

With the return of 8:00 am arrivals to the office this morning (as opposed to the travel season grace period of 9:00 am), I needed a little something to buffer my resentment against the extra hour. As per always, Page 2 delivered. Thank you TMQ and Patrick Hruby for saving my bleary-eyed day.